35 Years

We. That is one of my favorite words as I think about how we have evolved and grown and experienced life together over these three plus decades. Both Rick and I grew up as only kids. That fact has challenged us in many ways to lay down the “I” and become the “we” who record this episode today.

We closed episode 62 with a question. “What are we going to do to celebrate today?” Going to dinner at Campfire Grill would come later. The time getting there was filled with some pretty mundane details of life. Rick washed the car inside and out. I stepped outside to do some gardening and it is in this detail that the following story was written.

We have spent our time and resources renovating the inside of our home, leaving the outside until next year. Margot was a wonderful gardener and left us the gift of a garden that is a constant reminder of her love and presence. It blooms full with roses, phlox, hydrangea, black eyed susans and more. We get to look out the kitchen window and see the peonies that bloomed fresh this past spring after finding their 3rd home here in Flat Rock. They have moved with us from our first garden in Illinois all the way to where we are today. So while we have good vision for some changes we want to make in the future, this season has called for weeding, weeding and weeding. It is a small space that demands still a lot of attention. My self set goal for the day was to weed the side yard, the small landing strip for Louie to do his business. There is, what I am guessing about 3 feet maybe 4 from the house to the fence and then our neighbors house on just the other side. It was hot but I was ready. This pathway did not stand a chance.

30 minutes after scooping the poop and pulling the first few feet of wild growing things, I began digging up some flowering grasses to set closer to the house and that is when it happened. I dug deep into the second mound when I felt the first sting. Before I knew it, what looked and felt like a thousand yellow jackets swarmed around me. They were covering my legs, up under my shirt and on the brim of my hat. I ran down the pathway to the gate I had not opened in probably 5 years, praying it would open. I ran out into the square in front of our house, whooping and yelling the whole way. I contemplated tearing my shirt off, but even in the turmoil I had a shread of sense or vanity about me. Our darling neighbor, Anne came out her front door calling after me. “Cheri!! Are you ok?” She brought me shaking up to her front porch where she brushed the last bee off of my shirt and got me some cool water to drink. I was shaken.

The last time I had been stung had been long ago at Tanners, a beautiful apple orchard just outside of Peoria, IL. I had taken a sip from my hot cider not knowing a bee had found it’s way through the small slit in the lid. I was stung on the inside of my mouth. It was shocking then too.

I calmed down a bit sitting on Anne’s front porch. I thought taking a walk might help.

I got Louie and began to walk. I don’t believe I was thinking quite clearly. I called my granddaughter, Mabel, as she had this very thing happen when she stepped on a hive in Springdale Cemetery a couple of years back. I just needed to hear her voice and to know she knew exactly how I felt. She is 7.

“Oh Nena . . . I am so sorry. You need ice cream.” “Yes, yes I do,” I replied.

I called Rick to tell him what had happened and by the sound of my voice he knew I was not alright. He came home and I was given a real time example of what I spoke about in this episode. He offered me a calm that I can find no where else. I felt my blood pressure drop and I relaxed a bit in his presence. And then the pain set in.

Everyone will tell you that step 1 is to take the stinger out. Everyone must be able to see things not seen by the normal, ok slightly challenged, human eye. We could see no stingers. In the 15 to 20 stings I received, there were 7 that would go on to torment me with a fiery & biting pain that turned into an unbearable itch. Hydrocortisone, baking soda and water paste, bee sting X, Benadryl, ice packs and prayer; these were a few of my remedies.

Meanwhile, Rick was taking care of business to be sure this did not happen again. He

found the hive beneath the ground, drenched it with poison and dug it up.

Be still my heart.

I know bees do so much good and we need them in this world but not here. We have ourselves, Louie and our grand petites in and out of this yard and yellow jackets are pure evil. I cannot hear otherwise.

Just before disposing of this hive, he called me out to see how big it was. I stood there with a pure love and adoration for this man that went in to destroy their kingdom and take down their queen. Why? Because they came after his bride. I love this man.

In our early years together, my head was so full of what I thought a man should be in a marriage. I thought of the things I wanted in order to feel loved. Over some time I have surrendered many of my own ideas and invited God into those empty spaces. He is continuously creating in me the wife He would have me be and I have had the awesome privilege of watching Rick become the husband God

would have him be.

Today, celebrating 35 years of marriage, I am more in love with Rick than I could have imagined all those years ago. Every day is not easy but most of them are. WE are together. And on the days he slays a kingdom for me? I feel like a Queen.

Cheers